Still, after everything
The waitress waits for you to stop sobbing and order your damn breakfast already
And she holds the pen very loose.
I wouldn’t count on her to bring you tea
To comment on the highway from the window
To ask how far you’ve come to sob on the table she’ll soon clean.
While you are doing this:
Still, after everything, unfortunately
I picked my head up off the wheel for the green light
And peel back something of an unbrushed smile into the mirror.
In December
In the Midwest
My epitome. I am sleeping in the same clothes I’m wearing
Walking the aisles with unwashed hair, the inevitable cold, and tender eyelids
Buying hot lunch or a tube of chapstick.
It is the last month of my life because I only live for three months a year
Those months are November, December, and January, minus the holidays—I’m not alive for those.
You stood in a theater of adorning eyes.
You were tired of your brilliance. It prevented you from sleeping.
Not me. No. Never. I’m too busy using my hands in combat.
Look: I can run away now with no hands.